Beggars: What we should all give.
Filed under Others, Personal

Despite seeing beggars / drunks / homeless people / druggies on every corner of most ‘lower-class’ places in Hong Kong, I’m surprised to say I haven’t seen a single in the streets of England. Call me a beggar too, but I don’t think I’ve ever donated a cent / dollar / chip / knife to one of these chaps; nope, not even when with a girl I’m trying to impress.

Regardless, if one feels they must donate, they should not donate money but instead:

  • Cigarettes. Ease their pain a little, with a nice stick of nicotine.
  • A bottle of Tequila. Again, being homeless is hard. Get your fellow homeless man a bottle of Tequila, have a shot with him and enjoy the sun. If you give him / her money, they’re going to ask for more so that they can take a bus to the nearest liquor store. And because you just spent your last bit of change buying Tequila, you won’t have any spare for his / her bus ride. And you don’t want to have an argument with a highly-regarded homeless man / woman (with a knife)
  • A knife. Homeless people always get robbed. They have a big hat full of coins, and are usually too weak to defend themselves. Thus they become an easy target. Give them a knife, and they can just about fend off attackers without making as much noise as guns.
  • KFC. KFC solves everything. What came first? The chicken or the egg? The Colonel did and made KFC. Give the homeless person a bucket of fresh juicy KFC, and the world is your Oyster.
  • A Blackberry with a one year subscription. We’re all about that business. What makes a homeless man any different? He’s out on the streets doing his business too and making money like everyone else. Give him a Blackberry and help ease his business-related stress a little.
  • Condoms (homeless males only). It’s time to all help in preventing the spread of HIV. Give your homeless friend a pack of condoms. Teach them how to use it too; they’re probably homeless because they never managed to get a proper education, and so probably don’t know how to use a condom.

    • This beggar is speaking it for real.

    Beggar 1

    Robot Sex

    Maybe I should start carrying a bag with it all the above when going out and trying to impress a girl on our first date.

    This entry was published on Wednesday, September 27th, 2006 at 4:35 pm and is categorized under Others, Personal. You can follow any responses to this entry through the magic of RSS 2.0. You can also leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

    4 Responses to “Beggars: What we should all give.”

    1. Christy Says:
      September 27th, 2006 at 4:44 pm

      HAHA the first picture is funny. Anyway you mo liu. If you give him/her a knife he’ll just put it across your neck and say ‘gimme your CHEEEEEEN’

    2. Clinton Says:
      September 28th, 2006 at 11:57 am

      LOL That was hilarious.

      Clinton

    3. Web Says:
      October 5th, 2006 at 5:14 pm

      good comments
      the first photo rawks

    4. Jo King Says:
      October 8th, 2006 at 5:41 am

      happy to see you making new friends and having fun in England …!

    Post A Comment

    « An example of the corrupt police force
    Google Buys YouTube for US$1.65B »